Rules of Good Social Skills

Commenters debated a list of "Rules of Good Social Skills" largely around whether its advice is inherently neurotypical. NikolaNovak, who identifies as AuDHD, argued the rules read as excellent for neurotypical or extroverted people but need customization for neurodivergent or introverted behaviour; they warned that common signals like looking away don't necessarily mean disinterest. VCFundedGenYer and others echoed that the pieces are neurotypical-coded and sometimes harsh, while pseudosavant and b0rtb0rt defended the list as broadly useful - b0rtb0rt dismissing neurodivergent caveats as excuses and pseudosavant saying they agreed with every point. jbird99 and some tech commenters noted that certain items (like #31) call out a lecturing "professor" style that some associate with ASD tendencies.

A large part of the discussion focused on what "breaking rapport" actually means. NikolaNovak, Desafinado, Fernicia, rawgabbit and pseudosavant described it as nonverbal or conversational cues that create distance - looking away, changing body orientation, dismissing or contradicting someone, or shifting attention to a phone. runamuck and jareklupinski offered alternative takes (playful teasing, mismatching preferences), while ComputerPerson pushed back on advice against early open-ended questions, arguing they help scaffold conversation. Others raised context questions about online rapport (analog8374) and when creating distance is useful (phatfish), so opinion splits on universality versus tailoring and on interpreting specific signals.